The Da Vinci Code

There is so little to write about this that it's almost not worth a review, but being the highest world wide gross thus far of 2006 means I gotta write something so here it is: Even without the religious convictions that would lead people to hate this movie, viewers will be left sorely cheated out of $9.00 ($18.00 for those guys who made it a date movie, tough luck guys) by this lame, poorly acted, thrill-less adaptation of the world wide phenomenon that was Dan Brown's novel. The cast in this case was too good to be true; Tom Hanks, Audrey Tautou, Paul Bettany, Ian McKellen, how could they have gone so wrong? The settings are some of the best sights in Europe (and the only filmed elements to earn the rating). And Ron Howard, what happened to the great director of Cinderella Man and Apollo 13? And the novel, stone me if you must, but The Da Vinci Code was a terrific book, one of the most engaging books I've read, but this movie...Oh, this movie it was just...I don't know, awkward. Let me put it this way, When I read the book, I had just finished a two week absolutely exhausting educational tour (ironically having just seen many of the books locations) I was tired like you can't believe and I bought the book to start on the plane merely because of all the controversy. I finished it in two days, it was so exhilarating that I actually stayed up past 1:00 AM to keep reading, despite the fact that I was totally beat. That's how captivating it was. When I watched the movie, I'd had weeks of normal sleep, and not pushed myself in any way, and yet half way through I make no exaggeration, I was fighting to stay awake. I guess some books just aren't meant to be movies, Da Vinci Code must be one of them, because with all the right parts, director, cast, source material, and settings, it became the worst thing a summer movie can be; excruciatingly boring.

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